ril's Diaryland Diary


Reciprocal Cool

I want to re-visit something I said in my last entry. I used the term "reciprocal cool" in a specific context... and I meant it in that context... but... there's more to it than that. It is about a certain type of relationship with a certain type of special person.

The kind of people I am talking about are people I've met that... for whatever reason... I felt had a quality... something I can't quite articulate... that made me want to invest the time, effort, and energy in learning more about them. Some of these people have been men, some of them women... some of them were married, some of them weren't. It has nothing do to with that. I just thought they were... "cool." They just left me with the feeling that I was meeting someone who was going to enrich my life just by having gotten to know them.

Sometimes... just sometimes... someone I think is cool thinks I'm cool too. That's what makes it special.

The other day I was talking about this in the boy/girl context... but that was a specific case... the point behind "reciprocal cool" is not boy/girl interest... it's the person/person interest... shared.

The places I've met these people have varied over time.... the military... a favorite bar... a friend's party... a beach-side park... so it's not about the place. The place is just the place.

I have never been disappointed by my interest in these people. Some of them I haven't seen or heard from in years, and some of them are still among my closest friends... and yet I have great memories of all of them... and they have each, in their own way, made significant, positive contributions to my life's experiences.

I sincerely hope my date from last week will lead to more... more dates (we're going out again this weekend)... more friendship... and, perhaps, more...

but... even more than that... I hope I never miss the chance to get to know someone who is "reciprocal cool" ... because, you know, that would mean they thought I was worth getting to know too.

- 2006-01-19


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