ril's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The One That Got Away... The One That Got Away� I�ve thought about writing on this topic for some time now, and I kept talking myself out of it for a variety of reasons� but I can�t get the thoughts out of my mind and so I hope that by finally putting them down in writing that I�ll be able to let it go. I hadn�t thought of her in years� until I wrote an entry mentioning her a few weeks ago� and now I can�t stop� it�s driving me nuts� Her name was Ann (that�s her middle name actually, I don�t want to use her first name here). I first saw her at a party being hosted by a mutual friend. She was the most attractive woman I�ve _ever_ seen� the kind of woman that I normally steer clear of (self preservation is a powerful instinct you know)� but I just couldn�t help it� I walked right up to her and started talking to her as if we�d known each other for years (I have the ability, I just don�t normally put it on display unless I either know the person a little better or unless it is completely �safe� � like work, or court, or strangers you don�t give a rip about)� There was something about the two of us that just clicked� it seemed as if we really _had_ known each other for years� we talked for hours� and then we left the party together and went someplace we could talk some more (Denny�s, for coffee, if you must know). She was a freshman at Baylor� and I remember that she played the French horn so beautifully it was as if the angels themselves were singing praises to the Creator. She had a way of looking at me that made me feel that I was the only person in the world that mattered. When we held each other I felt a peace within me that I have rarely known since� and never as deeply� as completely. It was the love of great poetry� the feelings for which wars have been fought and lives sacrificed� �Did my heart love till now? For swear it sight, for I never saw true beauty till this night.� -- Romeo and Juliet, William Shakespeare � and I, with conviction (and ignorance) known only to fools and youth, and perhaps both in my case, did not realize what I had� �that their lovers may not think them too lightly or too easily won.� I didn�t know� I swear I didn�t know� � but that was a very, very, long time ago� The last I heard, she graduated with a degree in church music (which I don�t have too much to say about except to say that I didn�t know you could do such a thing), and she was living in north central Texas� and � as of a few years ago anyway � wasn�t married� It�s not that I think of her and wish we were together� because I don�t� what we had is a part of our history� and that is where it belongs� I don�t want to be with her� but sometime I think I�d like to see hear again� to tell her that I count our brief, distant relationship as one of my life�s greatest joys� and to thank her for it� though I would hope that, even after all this time, she knows it. But still� thanks� wherever you are� - 2002-01-16 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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